I wanted Ryan to make love to me the way a man loves another man and at that point I didn't care what could result from such an act. It was me who lea...ed in this time and I suddenly kissed him on the lips as if we hadn't been together for ages. Ryan grinded his naked body up against mine while we kissed each other. I broke the kiss for a second just to say, "... Ryan, I want to do it with you right now!... I wanna know what it feels like..." Ryan raised his eyebrows saying, "Okay Alex... But as. I swallowed, and then squawked out a ‘WOW!’ ‘You like it?’ she asked. ‘Like it!?! I love it! You look…stunning, beautiful, sexy…there aren’t enough words to describe how you look.’ She stood there swaying in front of me when I heard one of my favorite love songs come on the stereo, and I had an inspiration (and a desperate need to adjust again). I stood up, and tried to discretely adjust as I leaned forward and swept my arm before me. ‘May I have this dance?’ I asked. She looked at me for a. .. again," said Roger, remembering how she looked in her yellow bikini."Yes." Her voice wasn't any stronger."If you don't want to be with me, I'll understand," said Roger painfully."No!" she blurted, and then blushed. "I mean... it's fine."Now he did look at her. "Why is this so hard?" he asked."I don't know," she said softly."There has to be a reason," he said. "We're both adults. We both teach. This should be easy." I know," she agreed. "But it's not." Why?" he asked."I don't KNOW!" she. ”“Thanks, Penny. I guess I just don’t feel that hopeful anymore.”Adolfo, Morgan, and I had plastered an entire wall and had each created two-by-two-foot frescos by the end of class on August sixteenth. Doc pronounced that he was pleased with our work and that we’d receive full credit for the class—my last requirement for graduation besides my final project.I hadn’t played racquetball or set foot in the club in the three weeks since I got back from Colombia. Fuck it. I didn’t figure I’d be.
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