You had to be the one to tell her, because she doesn’t trust any of us because of the whole competency question.”“I know the adage ‘the truth ...urts’, but how badly?”“Badly, but it had to happen. Consider it like surgery to remove a tumor - there is pain and potentially a difficult recovery, but the alternative is that you die. The pain is necessary for healing. You’ll learn this, but one of the things doctors often have to do is inflict pain and suffering on their patients to prevent worse pain. She explained to me that a running person or someone in an apparent rush would draw more attention than a relaxed strolling person.I looked at her and said. “What made you decide to become a spy? I mean besides being the Sojonit leader.”She spread her arms and added. “Only a very few chose to be in this business, usually it chooses you. Spies are made by others, it’s not a choice and it is an old game that is played behind the shiny facades of civilization since time begun. I sort of slipped. It is weighing her down like an anchor. Tonight may just be the night. This just may be the last supper. She didn’t make it to Dick’s but if she adds a bar of dark chocolate to her vino it becomes a meal. Suicide was never very far from her mind. She can’t decide if it’s death she wants or if she feels as if death is her only option for freedom. Either way she is still unclear whether or not suicide will send her to hell, so she never pushes the envelope with this obsession. Well at least not. Diane had her own social life. She would drive out to parties or her girlfriends and go out on dates. The fact being that the more she was away from the apartment, the more fun Lila and I could have.All that was the setup... now comes my story and perhaps you can help me with my problem.Diane went out to a party and it was going to be one of those all nighters. I finished up at the library and raced home because Lila was going to be waiting for me to do some special role-playing she had.
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